Things learned from this Thanksgiving Weekend....

1. Don't use a pot that you normally cook with on the stove-top, in the oven. I have stainless steel pots, and I after cooking on the range, I placed it in the oven to finish cooking. I took it out with hot pads, but when I went to move it to a back burner, I forgot, and grabbed the handle. Holy hell that hurt.
2. If you are in immense pain from a burn, you will be desperate to try anything to make it go away. I had placed my hand in a bucket of cold water for an hour, and when I would take it out, it hurt worse, lots worse. My darling Jaded J left to go get aloe vera, and anything else he could find to help me. In the meantime, with my left hand I pecked out burned hand in Google, and came across this site. Earth Clinic. It had reviews for placing aluminum foil, shiny side in on the burn. So I made myself a foil mitten, and waited. Many reviews said you needed to fight through the first 5-10 minutes of pain, but it would get better. In 20 minutes the pain was gone, the skin was still tender, but I could move it. In fact the next day (Thanksgiving) I had full mobility. I was AMAZED!!!!! Jaded J was amazed, my mom was amazed, the ER nurse was amazed. I had no blisters, no scaring. Yeah Aluminum Foil.
3. Spending the afternoon of Thanksgiving in the ER is not fun. Luckily it wasn't me that needed to go, but my Mom. She has a bad back and she had pulled it out whack the Sunday before, by Thursday she could hardly walk. So after we ate (we did have priorities), I took her the ER. After lots of magic medicine in the IV, we left. But while we were there, I did run my aluminum foil remedy by the nurse, and she had no idea why it worked, but she was impressed.
4. Black Friday brings out the worst in some people. I went black Friday shopping 7 years ago, almost got trampled with my oldest daughter, and vowed never again. Whenever I get slightly tempted to go again, I read the articles about mothers (with children in tow) pepper spraying other mothers to get an xbox. Or people being shot in parking lots to get their purchases. Umm, no thanks.
5. If you decide to do a mid year clean up, remember where you stick the Christmas ornaments. We tore apart our house trying to find the teal and silver ornaments that we sprung for a year ago, no dice. We also tore apart the garage, nope. Luckily because we are pack rats, we had a variety of odds and ends and our Christmas tree turned out beautiful.
6. I still don't know how to cook a turkey. It was OK, but not great. I love to cook but roasting poultry is not my strong point. Still trying to find the definitive method to roast a chicken, and now added to the list is the turkey. Oh well, suggestions are welcome.....
7. The green bean casserole was AWESOME! What a difference all fresh ingredients made. Of course a ton of heavy cream never hurts either.
8. I love spending time with my family. I had 5 days off, and they flew by, and I don't want to go back to work, but I am grateful to have a job to return to. What a dichotomy.

No Excuses.....

I have no excuses for my long absence....none. I just didn't have the urge to write. I am like that, I get all excited about something, and then I peter out. Hence my sweater project, it is all done except one arm, and putting it together. Go go crochet, then nothing.

I did get an iPhone, and that has taken inordinate amount of my time, because it is so DAMN cool.I even have Blogger on it, but have not yet tried to post anything.

I have also been pondering the direction of my blog. I love fashion, but I don't buy much during the year, because we don't have the resources. And so.....I don't feel like I can blog about fashion trends when I wouldn't be able to try them out.

I have tried to keep my political leanings out of this blog, as I am sure many people would not agree with me. Unfortunately, those feelings and ideas make a big part of me. As I watch the deterioration of United States, I inch closer to making this more political. So I have been thinking and thinking on that change.

So I leave you with this....I am thinking of making this for Thanksgiving, homemade green bean casserole. Sounds so good....

Green Bean Casserole

Anyone else have other suggestions???????

Pin Head.

I have a love/hate relationship with hats. I love hats, they look like complete crap on me. For instance:

1. Baseball hats-I look like a pin head. Not flattering.
2. Stocking Hats-I look like a pin head. Not flattering, and itchy.
3. Cloche hats-I look like pin head. Not flattering, and hard to find.
4. Bucket Hats-I look like a pin head. Not flattering, and remind me of Woody Allen.
5. Fascinators-Never actually tried one on, assuming the pin head trend would continue, and quite frankly, they look like hats that are trying too hard. (No offense Duchess Catherine).
6. Hats with flowers-I look like pin head. Not flattering, especially with a garden growing out of my head.
7. Beret-My favorite hat, I look less pin head, but still have the potential.

I wish I could wear hats, and they would look decent on me. Oh the bliss of throwing on a baseball hat and walking out the door, cute, fashionable, and functional.*SIGH*

Do you have something that you love, but doesn't work well on your body?

Oh and my favorite pin head of all time (said tongue in cheek, a show that I have a love/hate relastionship, can't stand him, but love to mock him.):

ZaK Bagans from Ghost Adventures.

Projects?

Gah, I have had writers block lately.

I have been crocheting a new wrap for winter, because the inner geek in me loves the one that Duchess Kate was shown wearing after the wedding to Prince William. I love the color especially! Anyway, the color of mine is more olive, and truth be told looks nothing like hers, because I was too lazy to do a triangle, and the ruffle on the outside is beyond my skill set at the present time. Mine is probably better classified as a glorified scarf.

But......

I am going to try to expand my abilities with starting a crocheted sweater. I actually found a pattern that was sized from xs-5x, so I won't have to try to adjust a too small pattern (which I know I am not up to). I found a fellow crocheter (is that a word?) at work, and she is going to do a crochet a long with me. YEAH! I have been trying to learn how to knit, but so far it eludes me. I get the knit stitch, the purl stitch....ehhhh not so much. My mom has been trying to teach me, and apparently I knit too tightly, which is frustrating for her and for me. So while I struggle with the knitting, I wanted to do another project that would keep me off of the computer.

Behold:

Ok my promise to you my readers:

If this turns out and is somewhat presentable, I will not pose in my new sweater with a smug smile. That model annoys me, but the sweater is dang cute! I also need to find my yarn selection, I am hoping to find a iced blue green, or greyed blue green. *SIGH* There I go again with the grey, oh well.

One other project I have been working on is trying to rework this shirt to fit me

Unfortunately it has been a bust. The neck on this thing was HUGE. So I tried to sew the collar back together. That didn't work. Next I tried to make the neck smaller, but taking the neck part in by making the sleeves smaller, that didn't work. My sewing machine doesn't like knits, and by the time I finally got two decent seams in, and tried it on it had been an hour. To have it still not fit or work just frustrated me more, the shirt is going into the rag pile. Oh well at least I tried.

These have been some of the things occupying my time. I have also had my girls start school, and work has been busy. I have had no great ideas for posts, my little blog has suffered. Maybe with rediscovering my crochet, etc. this will lead to more posts. I hope so, because I love reading comments.

Bad Blogger Friend...ME!

I am not blogging as much as I had planned. I don't have any really good excuses except, I often times don't have much to write, my life can be boring.

I have been looking at the fall previews coming out, and I am getting excited about fall clothes. I generally don't like summer, or summer clothes. I am not fond of my arms being bare, nor do I like excessive heat which causes any amount of clothing to seem too much. I don't like sweating, just walking to my car. I don't like sweating period.

Above are some of the things that are catching my eye at Lucie Lu. Wish I had lots of disposable income right now, but it is the beginning of the school year, and my Sara's birthday, and Jaded J's birthday in September. So I will have my private lust list, and drool for a few more months.

My favorite items are the forest skirt and the dahlia skirt. I don't have many statement pieces in my closet, and these spot on perfect to me. Besides I love grey, we have discussed this before, so the dahlia skirt is totally calling me.

Ootd, hobby, and adult beverage.

First the Ootd:

Avenue Dress....that is it. Wore my ugly black sandals, and went out the door. I haven't posted an OOTD for awhile, because I still can't figure out where to take the pictures, and how to pose. I also should take at the beginning of the day when my makeup hadn't melted off, and my hair looks better. But....I have been wanting to do this since the beginning of my blog, and I determined to get better at it! Suggestions??? Please ignore, the pale face, and bizarre expressions in these pictures....

I bought a sewing machine for $25 bucks, my oldest and I are trying to acquaint ourselves with it, one little mistake at a time. Note to self....put the foot down before sewing otherwise it gets tangled in the bobbin. My goal is to make myself a skirt this fall, but I think sewing classes may be in order. Hannah is concentrating on making barbie clothes for her little sister, and pillows.

With the weather being so miserable here lately, sometimes the only cure is cold bear with bloody mary mix. So tasty.....just one a night though.....

Last picture, this is my hair now days. Longer, not as long as I would like, but I am doing well so far at not just whacking it off into another pixie cut. After I saw how my hair looked in the first pictures, I went and brushed it, and had my darling Jaded J, take a decent picture of it. What you can't tell is it is deep auburn with brighter red highlights. My natural hair color is really deep brown, but not quite black. Anyway...thought you guys might be interested in my progress.

How may I help you?

The do's and don'ts with phone reps.

I work as a phone service rep. And I DO like my job. There is never a dull moment in working on the phone, as each call is an adventure, and at least with my phone center job almost all calls are different. All of my previous jobs have been in retail, so I am conditioned in working with the public. And so because of my experience, I would like to offer some tips in dealing with a phone rep, especially if you have a problem.

1. Be courteous, and patient. I know this may seem almost redundant in asking, but it is number 1 for a reason. I can't help you, if you are yelling at me about something I have not been able to research, and don't have the background information about. Give me time, because the more you are willing to let me do my job the more I will be willing to find the solution you desire. If you keep yelling, I usually will try to get off the phone as quickly as possible, it brings me down, and I don't respond well to anger.
2. Don't make fun of my name. It is rude, plain and simple. I have had people ask me why my parents would name me that? I have had numerous people say "You're Georgia?, my name is Alabama!" And then laugh hysterically because they think it is the funniest thing in the whole world. I can't make fun of your name because I would get fired, but I also don't feel overly helpful when you start the conversation off like that.
3. PLEASE don't go the bathroom while we are talking. It is gross, and very apparent. No one would walk into a store and start asking a clerk a question and then proceed to pull down their pants and start to pee. I know the sound, hell everyone knows the sound...and it is 10 times worse with guys because it is very LOUD. So please wait to call, or wait until we're done talking.
4. If you are calling into a place you have worked before, don't name drop, and don't tell me 16 times that "it wasn't like that when I worked there". Policies change, times change, people quit and move on. I want to help you, but you threatening to tell the CEO that you don't like the new way of doing things is not going to help you, and besides I am not responsible for making the rules, but I do have to follow them. Similarly if we ask to verify you, it is not to annoy you, but to protect you. People complain about identity theft but don't like to take the 2 minutes to confirm themselves during a call.
5. If you have kids I know that sometimes they pick the most inopportune times to ask you questions, but please for the sake of my ears, don't start screaming at them. It hurts!
6. If you are calling me, try not to have three other conversations going at the same time, it is confusing, and makes the call last far longer than it needs to. Be in the moment fully.
7. Turn your TV down.
8. If you name has a common spelling, but you have a special way of saying don't get mad at me because I get it wrong. I am not trying to be rude, but there is no way for me to know that your name is pronounced a different way. Correct me, and move on.
9. Be reasonable in your expectations. Some things require additional research, and not everything can be resolved in one phone call. Let me help you.
10. I will end as I started be courteous and patient. All calls can start off on the right foot by following that one simple rule. I am more willing to work around you yelling at your kids and peeing in the toilet if you maintain your attitude in this way.

So there is a list of my do's and don'ts. I will say that I know it is frustrating to have a phone rep that is rude, and condescending and believe me I totally understand when that happens why people ask for a supervisor. I also know that some phone reps don't follow through with their promises, and I know that gives us a bad name. But I think it is key to remember that the person you are talking to (even if they are in a foreign call center) is a human, and that being abused by someone over the phone makes anyone feel down. So this is a great example of pay it forward, be nice to me, so I can make the call just as nice for the next person who calls in.

10 Followers

Thank you to those who follow my blog...I very lucky to have you involved.

Urban Decay......

"Condition where part of a city or town becomes old or dirty or ruined, because businesses and wealthy families have moved away from it."

Urban decay is fascinating to me. I regularly try to find websites the document the decay of buildings, or areas. The pictures are haunting, sometimes surreal. I am intrigued by how fast nature starts taking over an area, that we once claimed as our own. Also, by how fast things go to ruin once someone stops maintaining the building.

I am disturbed by the amount of things that are left in buildings once it has been abandoned. Such as wheelchairs, medical equipment, lawn chairs, golf carts, etc. I don't understand why these things are not given away, but allowed to rot. I assume that no one takes the time to find homes for these items because they just want to be done with the task of "closing" the building one last time. THIS REALLY BOTHERS ME. This is the reason for my post.

Look here for the lawn furniture, and kitchenware. I know this stuff was dated, but surely someone would have been able to use it?

Look here for medical equipment. I just can't believe that somewhere these items weren't needed?

There has been a slow awakening in me about the waste that I encounter on a regular basis by society. We dispose of the barely old to get "new", that will in turn be disposed of in short order. I am very guilty of this...I have 3 iPods at my house that are not used. I lusted after them, had to have them, and then promptly quit using them. I have gotten the latest and the greatest cell phone, to only use it for calling out, and an occasional text. I hate trying to use the web on a cell phone, screen is too small, cell phone can't handle the graphics, etc. So where I am going with all of this? I don't know.

I don't know the solution, and barely understand the question.

I just know that it bothers me. Everything being disposable. But, there are some things that are great (at least for me) because they are disposable. Like diapers...the poo factor never became easier even though it came from my own child. So I really can't imagine me doing loads of diapers and having to deal with the mess a second time. In writing this I see my own dichotomy, and so maybe I shouldn't criticize others who couldn't be troubled to find homes for unwanted items. But....really couldn't someone have used a wheelchair? A country that has an impoverished health care system? Or couldn't it have been used for parts?

I also wonder if someone just couldn't bear to part with it for free, and so rather than give it away, just let it rot?

I really try to be altruistic. I would rather give my things away to someone who could use them, than throw them in the trash. I am not good at garage sales for that very reason. I end up making next to no money because I just want the stuff gone, and almost feel guilty charging someone else to take my crap. Case in point, last weekend we did the great garage purge, and got rid of a ton of stuff. I put stuff by the curb, figuring that someone would stop and pick up the good stuff. This very nice lady came by and went through our entire pile, and repeatedly asked me if I wanted money for the items she was taking. She felt bad that we were just giving it to her, but in truth it was a win-win for both of us. I no longer had babies who could use a stroller, or car seat, she had a daughter that was pregnant and didn't have money to buy those items.

OK....enough rambling. Please take a moment to look at those site above. The pictures are just great, just from the artistic stand point alone.

Catharsis....kind of

Today I was reading Green Apples blog, and her newest post struck me. You can read it here.

So this is my response, or at least my gut reaction.

I was struck by someone who is so very thin ever having a worry about their weight. She is tall, and lithe, and clothes look fantastic one her. But her stories about growing up and the constant reminders that fat was just one bite away reminded me of my childhood. I instead of becoming obsessed about calories, went the other way and became cavalier about my eating habits.

I should preface the rest of this post with, I love my mother deeply. The rest of the post may make her seem insensitive, and at times mean. But no parent is perfect, and she was the better of my two parents, especially during an abusive upbringing with my dad.

One of my earliest memories with my mom, was her putting me on a diet at age 6 or 7. That time we ate tons and tons of pickles, because they were calorie free, or at least much better than potato chips. Today I like pickles, but, I would never eat one buy itself. This diet was followed by many more.

She would tell me:

"I was a butter ball. I didn't want to get fat because I would be made fun of, and not have friends. I didn't want to be know as the fat girl. I had a pretty face, but I needed to stay slim to have boys like me. "

I got the message that my self worth was dependent on my body type, and the only body type that mattered was a slim one. In the summer between my 8th and 9th grade years of school I finally lost my "baby fat", because I started walking everywhere, and biking everywhere,I just couldn't stand to be home. I got really skinny, like scary skinny. I remember thinking, my mom would let up on the weight thing, but instead it became not losing the weight, but not gaining it back. If I gained it back I was failure.

I then spent my teenage years attracting boys, being flirtatious, being whatever I thought they wanted me to be, to show my mom that someone did like me. I also treated those boys like crap, because once I got them, I didn't want them, and I used them to boost my ego. I had one boy in particular that stayed around, and we eventually got married. I didn't love him, I just wanted out of my house for good.

I wanted to be excited about my wedding, because at that point I was still fooling myself into thinking that this was the man I was going to be with the rest of my life. I let my mom plan most of it, but the one thing I was interested in and was excited about was my dress. I didn't have ideas of what I wanted, but I knew I would find the perfect dress, and that did make me excited. I found the perfect dress. I loved it, and couldn't wait to wear it. But my mother turned that dress into something to hold over me. By the time I got married, I hated the dress, and I just didn't care about the wedding at all. I had the dress a full year before I wore it. My mom told me that if I didn't keep my weight off and in fact lose some more that I would have to pay for the dress. Every dinner was torture, I was forced to go on walks with my mom every night. That dress became my nemesis. I was so young and naive, I thought my mom could make me pay for the dress. Not only did we have a strange relationship about my weight, but also about money. It seems my life revolved around the two, and were often intertwined. My feelings on my wedding day were ambivalence. Getting married was the lesser of two evils, and at least in the new scenario I was going to be in control

After the marriage, I started to think on my own for the first time. Before that my life had been survival mode, stay under my dad's radar, don't upset my mom, and try to find peace in my own way. I won't say I bloomed, because that would make it sound like it was an easy wonderful thing. I would almost say that the process was of me struggling up through the soil to find some light. I got really dirty, and it was painful, and hard, and tiring. I started to gain weight at that time, and haven't really stopped since. I was bullied in my old home, my weight was made fun of, and when I was finally on my own, I could thumb my nose at it. I didn't have to explain to anyone why Ben and Jerry were my best friends, and why I had a third helping. I was free of the constant criticism. My first marriage didn't make it 2 years, and I feel bad that I married him, but we both didn't know better.

I am still trying to reconcile being healthy and the old feeling of not being good enough if I wasn't skinny. I struggle, with wanting to show my mom that I am just as lovable at 200 lbs as I am at 115. That my weight doesn't change my core being.

Obviously that post hit something visceral in me, and I need to let go of some of the weight that has been on my shoulders about this subject. Thank you for reading it......

While I was away......

My Oldest turned 14, isn't she beautiful?

We got a new table and chairs! Table $50.00 from antique store. Chairs $1.00 a piece from Garage Sale, need to be recovered, but what a great deal! Look at the base of the table, how ATOMIC age can you get???? It totally matches our ceiling fan! YEAH!

Spring Has Sprung......My Lillies first blooms!Flower boxes planted and painted!

My Makeup Table before: Chaos & UGLY!

My Makeup Table After: Organized and Lovely


Tablecloth is an old Laura Ashley Sheet. Lamp from Goodwill that my Jaded J fixed. Soup Tureen ,Old Platter, Cream Pitcher, antiques given to me by my mom, so I finally found a use for them. Fruit Crate from awhile ago that I used a book shelf before, and now it stores my nail polish and extras. The make up mirror, another garage sale find. It sells for $110.00 at Bed Bath & Beyond, I got it for $5.00!!!!!!!!

Joan update.....She gets to go HOME early next week! Can you believe it? She is walking (still with a walker). She can go up the stairs, and has learned to get back into a car. She promised me that she would do NOTHING for the rest of summer but rest and be a lady of leisure.

Life is pretty damn good....!

Stripe Fascination Conundrum

I have been fascinated by striped tights for quite awhile now. I don't know how this all started, or why. I have run the idea by my soon to be 14 year old, she squealed with disgust at the thought of me wearing them. I have never mentioned them to Jaded J, but I am sure some witch inference would spit from his salty tongue.

Yet, with all of the objection....I still want them.

Today, I was looking through my blogs I follow and there was Lilli from Frocks & Frou Frou wearing the cutest outfit with striped tights. Here is the link. It made me want them all the more, because I have that basic outfit, except the tights. Of course Lilli is young and is way more than hip than me, so she can pull it off. But....I can't help but think that I would be darn cute in them too.

So what are your thoughts?

And one more blogger who pulled them off with panache, here.

Obama Fashion Moment

I love the Royals, as I have stated in the post about the Royal wedding. I also like the Obama's, but this is not a political blog, so I won't go into that.

I am in enthralled by the dress Mrs. Obama wore to meet the royals. It is by designer Barbara Tfank. I couldn't even begin to afford the original, but I am hoping someday I can find someone to make a knockoff in plus size, at a reasonable price. My favorite part is the color, that icy blue aqua. I think Mrs. Obama can pull off the pink jacket, I am not sure if I would wear it that way. I think a cute beaded white, or barely cream cardigan would be more my style.

After really looking at the pictures again, I know why I am so enamoured with this dress. It reminds me of the dress that Gidget wears at the end of the movie, when Moon Doggy pins her on the beach. I tried in vain to find a picture of this dress, or any dress that Sandra Dee wore in that movie, all pictures showed Sally Field, darn!

Smoother Sailing.......

My wonderful, beautiful friend Joan has gotten to come back home, well at least to our hometown.

She is currently in a rehab hospital, learning to walk again. But she is close, and she is doing fantastic in all other ways.

Last night I went to see her. I had such a visceral reaction to seeing her coherent, and talking, and aware, I burst into tears. She burst into tears. We were both so happy to see each other, to get that second chance to say "I love you", "I missed you". She is a miracle.

Her smile, was the balm I needed. I found the peace I sought since she went into the hospital. I know this sounds sappy, but I can't describe my feelings in any other way. I have been on a high ever since, because anything seems possible. I can see the joy.

Here is to second chances, sometimes given directly, sometimes lived vicariously through others.

Wedded Bliss

I will admit that I am a fan of the royal family. So I got up at 4:00 on Friday morning, and watched the wedding. One of my favorite memories of my childhood, was getting up at the same time to watch Charles and Diana's wedding with my mom. It was a true mother and daughter moment. I was 10 years old, and that wedding will forever be the "fairytale" brought to life for me. I fell in love with the dress, the tiara, the pageantry, everything. I know that many people think that Diana's dress was the epitome of 1980's fashion, big over the top, etc. But, I think her dress was timeless. Perhaps it is the 10 year old in me still that hangs on to it.

I always watched with interest her mothering of her boys, and they seemed to truly adore her, despite being born in a fishbowl. So I was eager to watch her oldest get married, and I hope for his sake that his marriage is built on love.

The wedding on Friday was beautiful. I got to share it with my oldest daughter. Maybe 30 years from now she will watch his children get married with her family.

Every once and while it is nice to think that fairytale's come true.

Colorful Memories

The video is of our Easter weekend. The date on the video is completely wrong....sorry got so caught up doing this for the first time, I didn't proof read it.

The colored bubbles were very fun, but extremely messy!!!!!!! And dying easter eggs was also fun, and surprisingly less messy. Easter is always low key at our house, and I really enjoy that.

Hope you enjoy the video!!!!!

Can you be friends at work?

Have you ever met a person, and just knew that they are going to be a good friend? That you could trust them? That no matter how serious or disgusting your secret is, they would get it, and not judge? I met one those people about 3 years ago, at work.

Lindsay.

We have a 10 year age difference. I am old, she is young. We have different points of reference, she is a farm girl, I have always lived in a city. But...we click.

Her sense of humor is wicked and naughty. She has beautiful brown eyes that dance when she is being mischievous (which is often). She laughs, and can find the humor in most circumstances. She smiles, a lot.

She is practical. She is determined, and strong. Her devotion to her family is inspiring, especially her commitment to raise her boys as sensitive strong men. She loves her husband without reserve. She is also has a dedication to her Czech heritage that I think is really cool, and is passing that on to her sons.

I think that the best part about our friendship is that she listens, and asks lots questions. Sometimes I feel like I monopolize the conversation, because she has a way of bringing things out that I wouldn't normally share. Sometimes our schedules don't work out for eating lunch together, and that is hard, as I really need my Lindsay time. I need to have a laugh.

She can be an absolute imp, but I love the playfulness. I believe that God puts people in your life for specific reasons, and I know that Lindsay was my gift at work, because sometimes it can be overwhelming there.

So my Lindsay Lou Who......you have made a big impression, but I can't imagine life without you. Thank you.

Eshakti Wish List....

This dress is complete whimsy for me, for a number of reasons. The color is all wrong for my complexion. The neckline is too deep. It is sleeveless. It would probably make my bottom look bigger than it really appears. That being said, I love it. It is fun, and unusual. I wouldn't have any place to wear it, so it makes a nice wish list dress. I can it wear it in my dreams, and have it all magically fit and be flattering.

This dress struck me because of the sweetheart neckline, and it has been a long time since I had anything with that type of neckline, it tends to be universally flattering. I like the dark color, I can see it being great for the office, but also going out to dinner or social event that needs to be dressy. I can totally see this with a pearl choker, and black peep toe heels.

This dress is sweet and demure. I am not sure if it would work on me personally as I think my bust is too big for a neckline like that, and I am sure it would bulge in a ugly manner. But I like the khaki color with the light contrast stitching.

I like this dress because of the print, and the zipper detailing on the waist. If I were to buy this I would actually get it in the sea green and black combo. But I also like the violet and black.

I really like this dress because is it is colorful, and fun! It also has the vintage asethic that I have been going after lately.

I have been lusting for yellow lately. I really want a pair of mustard yellow shoes for next fall. I have found a couple of pairs that are really cute, but the heel was ridiculously high. I am thinking that yellow is not the most flattering color on me, but I want it none the less.

Transplant Thoughts

I have been thinking hard about the transplant that Joan received last week. I am so grateful that she was able to get the liver in time. I also feel an infinite sadness for the family who lost someone so Joan could live.

Joan and I discussed this when we found out that she needed the transplant. I think she was conlicted about it, I would be too. For me the conflict would be, could I live a worthy enough life after the transplant to deserve it? I don't know Joan's reasons of doubt, as she keeps everything close to her heart, but perhaps she has/had the same fear. I know that the person who gave Joan her liver did not die by choice, but for them to think beyond their death was altruism at its best. We will never know why the person who signed the donation card decided to do it in the first place. In fact, it seems we will never know anything at all about the person, as these things are kept private.

The donor family will never know Joan. I hope that they are finding some solace that their loved one is helping another family not deal with a death. If I could say thank you, I would a thousand times. Joan has always made the most of her life, and I know that with this second chance she will continue to do so. So even if she fears she is not worthy of this chance at life, I know undoubtedly that she is someone that has much more to give.

Tentatively.....OH HAPPY DAY!

I have had one of those weeks, that I hope will not be repeated in LONG time. The stress level has been off the charts, and my emotions have been back forth too many times to count.

I really thought that I had seen Joan for the last time. She took a turn for the worse last weekend, and just couldn't come back from the trauma. We found out on Tuesday that her new liver was failing, and she was going to be put back on the transplant list. Thursday she was really doing badly, and quite honestly I didn't know if she would make it. Then, nothing short of a miracle happened. They found her a liver and she received it yesterday morning. It was one month to the date from the first transplant. I have spoken with Jack numerous times since she came out of surgery, and everything is going well, dare I say really well? Her real color is coming back, her body chemistry is working. The doctors have warned that this is still going to be an uphill battle for her, because her body has gone through so much, and her stamina needs to be built up. But....my Joan as of today is doing better. Even a little better is glorious to the ears. They are talking about getting her up and walking maybe by Monday or Tuesday.

Thank you for the support that everyone has given me. I am sure that we will face more dark days, but hopefully with setbacks that can be taken care of quickly. I have a lot more that I want to write about this, but I wanted everyone to know the update, as it was finally good news.

Cats In Happy Land!

So the weather here in Nebraska has once again turned. Now today it is once again beautiful, and no wind. The cats have decided that they own the window sills. The white fluffy one is my Tula baby. The orange & white is Pablo, the potato hunter. Both are getting so fat that their bellies over flow the windows.

All for the love of the game....translation all for the love of my child.

I am not sure if everyone is aware, but Nebraska is a windy place. I MEAN WINDY!!!! Yesterday we started out in the mid 70's in about 2 hours it dropped to about 50. Brrrrr! All because of the wind. The wind howled and moaned, the trees danced and bobbed, my windows shook. It was windy all day long. I was late to work today so I threw on a trusty knit dress and cardigan and out the door I went with no tights or socks on. The no tights thing was fine at work, because it is usually kinda warm in my office. I was not planning ahead very well however, and I forgot about my youngest soccer game. Normally I would have time to go home and change, but today I stayed late to make up my time, and to get some extra work done.

So off I trotted to the soccer game with only a knit dress, and light cardigan. Can we say brrrrr chilly willy wing wong??? I froze my arse off. My lovely Jaded J brought me socks, and luckily we had a blanket in the car. By the end of her game my hands were frozen, my legs were icicles, and my nose was on constant drip mode. But, it was all worth it to watch her run and shout and block and kick. She is free out on the field. The child was born to run.

Sports and I have a bad relationship as my eye hand coordination is lacking, and I generally sucked at everything I tried. But my darling Sara, she was born with Jaded J's grace and abilities. I am surprised at how much I enjoy rooting her on at the games. I really hope that next game is bit warmer though!

Everyone had a great day....

Today was just beautiful here. The weather brought everyone out of their houses. I know for me that it helped my attitude too! I have been down lately, and the better weather was a much needed upper.

My windows are open as I write this, and I can hear my youngest playing on the front stoop. She is playing "puppies", what we nicknamed the Littlest Pet Shop dolls/pets. I love to hear her play, and have her make up the conversations. The cats have been in the windows all day, sniffing the spring air, and telling off the squirrels. We went to the park and had an ice cream cone. Tonight we are having our first steak on the grill. Can you say paradise?

I hope that every one else had the same kind of day. The weekends always go too fast.

Quick Joan update: I went to see her on Friday after work. She looked the same to me, very yellow, and was kind out of it. But...they did find a hole in her liver that was causing the bile to pool in a stomach cavity. Upshot, they are draining the hole now with a device that comes out of her body, but the hope is that they now know what is wrong and are making small steps to improve her condition and she will slowly start to get better. So we are all cautiously optimistic. The good news is that her liver is not rejecting, and is growing A LOT!

Keeping busy...

I am trying to keep my mind and heart busy with other things because of the unrest about Joan. Happy hands, happy heart. So my new quest is to find a new hairstyle. I have always had bangs, and I do mean always. So for the last two days I have pulled them over with a bobby pin and I am trying a no bang look. Can't quite decide if I like it, I will take a picture later so everyone (all 5 of you) can give me your opinion. Today I put a little flower clip by the bobbie pin, and I think it is quite cute. But I love flowers, and I guess I am still a 5 year old at heart. Hence my undying faithfulness to Mary Jane shoes.


I have also been thinking about learning to sew. My new friend Lauren from Minxden has made the cutest tops lately with appliques, and I have been reading other blogs from people who make their own clothes on a regular basis, and it has inspired me to want to sew. I have my moms old Singer sewing machine, and it needs to be overhauled before I start anything. Right now my focus is going to be on simple skirts, and such. I get frustrated by the lack of cute skirts in my size, with the vintage look I have been trying to achieve. I did sew for a brief bit in 7th and 8th grade, but I have lost most of that knowledge. I think my downfall will be me being overly critical of my work, and never actually wearing it. I also need to find someone to teach me. So I have some plans and thoughts laid out...now to have them come to fruition.

Long Journey home.....

Yesterday we went to Omaha, so I could see Joan. It was eye opening, but not in a feel good movie kind of way.

She is a color, that can only be described as highlighter neon yellow. Her eyes, her scalp, everything, is yellow. She is a beautiful woman, and to see her so changed was difficult. She was able to communicate, and she smiled her beautiful Joan smile, but I could sense her fear. Fear that this nightmare situation is never going to end. Every time she takes some small step forward, another hurdle comes up. She has a blood clot in her leg, that they can't treat with medicines because her liver can't handle it. She has gained 55 pounds in water weight because her kidneys aren't functioning, which is making it hard for her to breathe. Now the prognosis on the kidneys has moved from a couple of weeks to 6-8 weeks.

I had much to think about on the ride home. Mostly about how I would be under this pressure, and I am not sure I would handle it with such grace. I feel bad because I am relieved it isn't me. I got to come home and take a nap, in my bed. Going home at all, that luxury won't be hers until maybe late May or June. In writing this post, I keep stopping and thinking about her. Her surroundings are a more spacious than I thought they would be, but they are so clinical. I can't help her. I want to help. I want her to be able to smell the spring air in the next few weeks. I don't want to have every improvement she has to be tempered by more bad news. I want her to be able to assert herself again and control her own life, not have it controlled by a machine, and blood draws, and shuffles around the hallways.

I know these posts are debbie downers, and I am sorry for the for that, but they help me process my feelings.

It's a new dawn, it's a new day and I'm feeling OLD?

Update on my friend Joan, she is making a slow recovery. Two more weeks in ICU, and as of right now her kidneys are still on vacation, but....her LIVER is growing, and there is lots of HOPE that everything is going to come out fine. So onward baby steps, and please keep her in your thoughts.

Today my oldest daughter got her braces on, and it drove home that she is starting her journey to womanhood. She starts high school next year, she is making decisions about her future that will hopefully lead to her a fulfilling career. She still talks to me candidly about almost everything, and it is such a joy to find her discovering herself and abilities. I think this part of motherhood excites me more than the baby, and toddler years. It certainly is challenging, but I feel we are closer. She asked me to dye her hair black today, I have resisted this request for two years. I don't know exactly what changed my mind, but I think I felt comfortable with her ability to make the decision. I personally am not a fan of dyed black hair, because it usually looks, well I guess ...dyed. I am one to talk though, as I am sure the colors of my hair have never been seen in nature on their own occurrence. Especially the glob of bright pink hair that I had last summer. So she is sitting right now with black on her hair, ready to change, scared of the difference, a great parallel to the place she is right now in her journey.

Fashion news! I bought a cardi yesterday with an brown leopard or cheetah print (can't tell which one). This is very surprising for me, as I am not huge fan of the animal prints. But, since I have been chasing after a more vintage look, this seems to fit right in. I thought about getting a skirt with that kind of print, but I am more excited about the prospect of the cardi. I also ordered a great dress from Avenue last night. I had a coupon for 50% of my highest priced item, if I bought two things. So I found some clearance panties for $3.99, and my dress ended up being only 29.99, when it started out at 59.99. YEAH ME!

I am not above buying used clothes. I found a board called the fatshion exchange board. Most of the stuff is too small for me, but I did find a cute boho skirt and sweater. I paid for it two weeks ago, and I have yet to get it. The seller disappeared, so I started a claim with paypal. That finally brought the seller out of the woodwork, she had a virus on computer,blah blah blah. Still no clothes, and now she won't reply again. Very frustrating. I just don't understand someone who tries to scam through these boards, it makes a bad experience for everyone. Oh well.....in a couple of weeks I should have my money back.

Personal Tsunami.....

Usually I am glib, sarcastic, perhaps a bit irreverent.

Today I am none of those things. Today I am praying that God or whomever controls our universe has one more miracle. A dear friend of mine is in hospital 50 miles away, trying to find the reserves to come back from a liver transplant that was done a week ago. Naively I thought she would be coherent and aware by now. She is not, a three day stay in ICU has turned into a week, without any end in sight. Her kidneys have taken a vacation, she now has daily dialysis. She has not woken up for the last 24 hours. Her body chemistry is going in the wrong direction.

We knew of each other in college, when I was undergrad theatre major and she was getting her masters in theatre. But, we really connected when a few years later we both had daughters a year apart in age, and we both were struggling to gain our footing. She was a single mom from the outset, but her devotion and determination to raise Annie as strong woman was/is inspiring. She followed her dreams before Annie to New York, and then came back home to Nebraska when life threw her a curve ball. She worked three jobs, and eventually got a job as theatre instructor at a local university. She met her soul mate there, I call him her Peanut butter, without him she is just jelly. She thrived, Annie thrived.

5 years ago her spleen went wonky. She had major surgery, they fixed her plumbing, and all seemed better. Until 2009 when she became tired all the time, her skin turned yellow, as did her eyes., her liver was failing. Last June they decided to put her on the transplant list, and she waited. Her cousin at Christmas time offered to be tested, and he was match. What none of us realized is that she had so much toxin built up in her that her tiny half liver is having a hell of a time getting rid of them, and also trying to grow. They told her husband yesterday that they might have to put her on back on the national registry as this "baby" liver may not be able to handle it all. Her husband has not left her side, has slept in a chair every night, and learned the machines and to read the lab results.

Her name is Joan.

To Joan, please know that I can't imagine Annie & Jack without you. I love your high cheekbones. Your perfect teeth. I love your laugh. I love your flour frosting, and the fact that you make it just to eat without a cake being in the way. Your commitment, and tenacity have always amazed me. We need you. Please keep fighting. We have many things to giggle over. You promised to be my room mate in the nursing home, we even have our outfits planned. You get me, off kilter humor and all. Joan, I love you, don't leave.

Normalcy returns

My last week has been better at work, the tension is at least gone. But, I miss my friend, and it is lonely without her.

Some fashion news: Lane Bryant had a great sale last weekend, and I was able to get a cardigan, dress and skirt for $32.00. I wore my new skirt and cardi today and got a ton of compliments. I should have taken a picture when I got home, but I just wanted to slip into my grey tshirt and jeans. Told ya I love grey! Speaking of which I bought another grey tshirt in my jaunt to Target.

To borrow some style from one of my favorite bloggers Minxden. Here is a list of things that made me happy today.

1. Got a new Grey T-shirt.

2. Someone told me I was "stylin" today at work.

3.Got to finally try Lorina Sparkling Blood Orange soda. YUM!

4. Reading this post from another one of my favorite bloggers Bella from One Sister's Rant. It made me laugh, hard. It is totally something I would love to do to the Ms. Vogue's and Ms. Elle's of the world.

Hard week.....

I have had a tremendously hard week. Most of it can't be discussed here, but it has left me down. I could sense that something was off in my department, there was tension that was almost palpable. Everyone felt it, everyone reacted to it. By Thursday I was miserable, because I knew something bad was going to happen, it was just a matter of when. Friday I had made it most of the day, and nothing had happened, and it felt different, like a decision was made. Unfortunately, the decision was that someone had to be fired (not me), and it was a good friend. She may have made some grievous mistakes, and some of them could have happened because of bad equipment. I will never know the absolute truth, and the outcome is the same regardless. I feel vulnerable. I know that every job has the chance of being laid off, being let go, etc. This situation has brought that fear to fore front on my thinking. I feel bad for my supervisor as she didn't make the decision lightly and I could tell she felt like hell about it. I of course worry about my friend as now she has to face finding a job in a shaky economy, and trying to explain why she was let go on her resume. I take everything to heart, I want to fix this, but I am unable to.

Life is difficult.

The Mr Darciest of them all...

'

How do I love thee???? My favorite Mr. Darcy?

I am so excited that Colin won the Oscar last night, he has been my favorite since the A & E Pride & Prejudice miniseries came out. He was the perfect Mr. Darcy. Oh to be Elizabeth.

Anyway, had to spread some Colin Firth love.......

Jaded J...you will always be my one and only. Now, if only you would wear tight pants, and ride a horse.

Spring Dreaming

Can you tell I have some spring fever? Most of this stuff is baby pink, and that has to be one of the all time worst colors on me, but every spring I fall in love with it. I can wear pink eyeshadow until the cows come home, and it is very flattering, but pink clothing washes me out. I also love the color peach, that color too is hideous on me. I bought a peach prom dress once, that was disaster. Anyway, I am ready for flowers, and pastels. How about you?
Spring Dreaming by meowfish on Polyvore.com

Cinnamon Rolls.....Snow.

Today it snowed, again. Yeah. (Sarcasm)

I took the day off from the work to get our brakes done on the van, unfortunately our mechanics wife was in the hospital, so our brakes will have to be done another day.

Then the snow started.

So I made these cinnamon rolls. They make a ton....but I felt like eating a ton, so it all worked out. Seriously these are delicious, and fairly easy.

My outfit tree is currently surrounded by the white stuff, so my new outfits will have to wait. *SIGH*

Extant Clothing......

I think it is obvious that I like clothes. Even when I was little, nothing made me happier than a new dress. One of my moms favorite stories is when I started Kindergarten I had a new outfit for everyday the first week. Apparently I thought I was going to get a new wardrobe every week, and I kept asking where my new dress's were the next week, after the first week, school had lost it's appeal.
I worked in a small clothing boutique during my college years, and even though we mostly catered to little old ladies, I even enjoyed dressing them in the polyester they craved. I could have worked that job forever, but the pay was dismal, and well I had a degree now so....I thought I needed to use it. Somehow that landed me in a banking job, which was the worst job experience of my life, and how my history degree translated into banking is still beyond me. I have digressed....
My love of clothing goes beyond the things in my own closet. I have always been interested in clothing from earlier time periods. My favorite time periods have to be the Georgian and the Regency periods. The Georgian clothing was all about flash, decoration, excess,tafatas,brocades,furs. The Regency was about minimalism, Greek and Roman inspiration. Slim column dresses, empire waists, light colors and muslins. I also love to look at more recent "vintage" 1930's, 1940's and 1950's are favorites, hence the girls in my header. Anyway while I appreciate people who can recreate the dress's from the earlier time periods (especially because I can't sew), I am always more interested in looking at things created in their own time period. Can you imagine making a dress for someone like Marie Antoinette, the amount of time it would have taken, no sewing machine, tons of fabrics, and the details?
I use Google to look up extant clothing from different time periods. I like looking at the undergarments as much as the over ones, reading how to get dressed in these items. Last year when Princess Di's famous black evening gown was sold at auction, I was curious about it. I went to the website that was hosting the auction along with other Di clothing memorabilia. They had the muslin prototypes of her wedding dress, her engagement blouse, etc. What even excited me more was that they LOTS of extant clothing from all different eras. I was in heaven, because they take decent pictures, and go into decent detail about the products. I joined their mailing list because I could spend hours going over their goods, and I just got my email today for their next auction. If you want to look at some exquisite pieces then go here Kerry Taylor Auctions. They are selling the dress that Kate Middleton wore at a charity modeling show, I thought it was ugly...but I am sure it will be worth a lot to someone!

Simple and Classic......

Dress is at all times a frivolous distinction, and excessive solicitude about it often destroys its own aim.
Jane Austen

Today nothing cried out to me to be worn. So I put on a trusted black sweater, with grey skirt. WA LA! Instant comfy outfit. I usually wear my black and grey scarf with this, but decided today to break out the pearls. The other two pictures are my youngest daughter, she photographs so much better than me! Anyway...not much new to report in my world.

Skirt & Sweater & Tights: Avenue
Pearl necklaces: Mom
Shoes: Mootsie Tootsies

Hi Ho Sailor OOTD...plus TREASURES!

Last night my daughters and I went on a late night shopping trip to a local antique store. We weren't looking for anything in particular, just wanted to look around, and we were stir crazy! My youngest daughter found a beautiful non vintage ring with a citrine stone in it. My oldest daughter who was in up most despair of finding something, found herself a Beatles book. I found the purse below. It was tucked behind something else, and I found it, bonus it was 15% off!

My outfit today was not inspired by anything, but seemed to have a nautical theme once I looked at the pictures. My shoes I assume would very un sailor like or pirate like as they consisted of sequins, LOL! The breakdown is as follows:

Lace Cami- Lane Bryant
Sweater-Target
Pants-Avenue (bought off of eBay)
Flats-Target

Today my oldest daughter and I went to some antique store downtown. The first shop we went to was a jewelry lovers paradise! It had beautiful pieces, mostly vintage. I am putting myself on a strict budget for the next couple of months, so I have to REALLY love something before I buy it. I can normally justify any purchase, but I am (starting today) trying to be more budget minded. I have my ears pierced, but can no longer wear earrings due to any allergy. I have had shopping for clip ons on my mental list for awhile, and we found 3 pairs that each cost a dollar. I went up to pay, I only had my credit card with me, which I know can cost a merchant a lot if they use it. I asked if I could purchase them with my card, and I would have totally understood if they said "no". The guy instead of making me pay or putting them back let me have the earrings! I felt so bad about this, as I know they are there trying to make a living. I insisted that this was not necessary. The nice gentleman and his wife stated that I just needed to come back in the future and buy other things, and that this was my valentines gift from them!!! So I am going to give them an official shout out, if you are in Lincoln, NE and you need some antique or vintage items please go to Burlington Antique Mall in the Haymarket. I guess they also have some eBay listings, so if you can't get here, let them ship to you!
All in all this was a great weekend!